It’s a bit cursed.
As a Red Sox fan, I’m proud to own a few pieces of Sox memorabilia. I have a Triston Casas bobblehead (prayers up) from his bobblehead night last year, a supposed-vintage Pedro Jersey that I wear to most games I go to (not real Sox merch, but made in the late 90s), the 617 T-shirt, and a hat with some signatures. Nothing big or major or worth a ton of money.
Some old family friends just moved out of my hometown, and they were cleaning out the place before their departure. The family patriarch found an unopened Pedro bobblehead and offered it to me. I excitedly said yes, unaware that something is Wrong With It until I picked it up from them.
I mean look at it. Is he okay? Is the spirit of the vengeance Pedro felt against Don Zimmer somehow trapped inside this thing behind the bobblehead’s tight, creepy smile and dying eyes? This is not the silly Pedro we know and love, nor is it the fiery powerhouse multi-time Cy Young winner. This is a different man entirely. He is also fat and has a flat butt.
There’s a surprising lack of information on the box about it. It was made by a company called Bobble Wobbles, but does not tell me when or where. To me that adds more creepiness, or mystery if I feel optimistic.
So what do I do with it? I have a few options.
Option 1: Exorcise It
Will I unleash a demon? Possibly. Isn’t this how horror movies start? Also, would I have to exorcise it in Spanish? I know the absolute basics of Spanish and that’s it.
Option 2: Burn It
Would this also bring out a malevolent spirit? Wait, but it’s hand-painted. Somebody put real work into it. Burning it would be kinda messed up to do to something that someone really hand-painted.
Option 3: Fix It
How though? What would I do? I guess I could put little doll-sized sunglasses over it, but they might come off when the bobblehead bobbles. Could I paint the eyes so that they look less stoned?
Option 4: Celebrate It
It’s a little deranged, but it’s a real vintage Red Sox bobblehead of my favorite Sox player of all time. That might just make it worth it in the end.
The Pedro bobblehead likely won’t be the last piece of Sox-related merch I acquire, but hopefully it’ll be the last cursed one.